Aren’t you just sick of watching the internets since this morning?

iPhone This, iPhone That, iPhone where, iPhone what! It’s a phone guys! Not like Katherine Heigl walking naked into my bedroom!!!

1. Don’t read Digg. Seriously, those fucking geeks just can’t get enough of Steve Jobs’ dick.

2. Don’t watch YouTube. Fucking retards are posting iPhone videos like it’s interesting. Hey look at this video of me turning on my brand new iPhone!!! Oh my God, I dropped my iPhone into my bed and it almost hit the floor!!!

3. Turn off your internet connection just for the next couple of days as you let the buzz simmer down. I am starting to feel like there’s no escape.

4. Read a Christian news site. With the iPhone launch being treated like the second coming, it’s totally appropriate.

5. Use the search feature in your feed reader and do an auto-delete of any post with the word “iPhone” in the header and the body….yes, including this one.

Seriously.

I’m addicted to horoscope. I used to troll alt.astrology in usenet and subscribe to four newspapers just to read what’s in store for my sun sign. I went through a second-hand book binge for astrology books too. It lasted about a year and a couple hundred dollars.

Cellphones used to serve a simple function for me: make calls, receive calls, send text messages, receive text messages. That’s it.

Ringtones never really did anything for me. I could care fish what song played when my butt-ugly boss calls me at 2 am while I delight in deep slumber. I did put in some work for alarm tones though. I sought high and low for the loudest, most obnoxious alarm tone I can find to wake me up in the morning. Kerrrrannggggg!

Cellphone games are a bore to me as well. Once I finished saturating my brain with GTA and Halo, those beep-beep-beep action games just don’t cut it even as a time-waster.

So I fishing thrilled my ass to death when I found out I can get horoscopes in my phone. Finally, a new use for my overpriced call and text machine: Horoscope Updates! Seriously, I love the service. Horoscopes really cheer me up, even if all it says is: “Don’t leave home today or make any investments. You will have really bad luck.”

LOL!

InPhonic has some of the best cellphone content you can ask for, including the best daily horoscopes for all the astrology fix I need! They own Wirefly, who we wrote about earlier with their awesome phone deals and exhaustive Wirefly ringtones, with all the tones you need to numb your ears. InPhonic and WeatherBug also recently inked a deal to provide weather alerts on your phone throughout the day so you never have to bring an umbrella, sunscreen and winter coat when you leave home all at the same time!

You can get InPhonic content from select InPhonic-powered Web sites and the mFly mobile content site.

If you’re itching to get the latest and hottest brand new mobile phones, one of the smartest ways to pick them up is to purchase a new cell phone plan. And whatever features you’re looking for in a new plan with whichever carrier, you’re guaranteed for find the best deals at Wirefly.

They provide plans from all carriers like Verizon, T-Mobile, Cingular, Alltel, Nextel, Amp’d, Disney and Sprint.

They provide tons of great features, each of which can greatly help you in choosing the best plan for your needs. My favorite functions include:

• List of family plans wher eyou can share airtime minutes, including unique features for each
• Wireless Wizard which includes all carriers where you can learn how to save you up to 40% on your monthly wireless bills
• The ability to shop by carrier, cell phone plan or handset type
• Top ten phones list with a direct link to the plans where you can get each handset
• Phone upgrade, where you can trade in your old phones for a newer handset at a heavily discounted price
• Service to let keep your old number even after changing to a new plan
• Choose plans from a list and see them side by side so you can make a complete comparison

I absolutely love the deals they feature on the main page. I wish it was a smart idea to buy 5 plans so I can have 5 awesome phones all at 5 awesome deals. I’m just afraid I wouldn’t know what to do with that many phones and those many minutes!

Their plans on Nextel phones offers the awesome Motorola Buzz ic502 in very attractive yellow with a $40 mail-in rebate. My favorite Sprint cell phones plan include a Motorola Q as your free  cell phone.  I’ve been dying to get my hands on that phone, it’s swanktastic!  T-Mobile has my favorite plans.  The Get More 1000 plan has 1000 minutes, nationwide long distance and a free T-Mobile Dash phone!

All orders come with free FedEx shipping and an innumerable amount of deals and bonuses so get on Wirefly now and get your next phone and plan with them!