Seriously.

I’m addicted to horoscope. I used to troll alt.astrology in usenet and subscribe to four newspapers just to read what’s in store for my sun sign. I went through a second-hand book binge for astrology books too. It lasted about a year and a couple hundred dollars.

Cellphones used to serve a simple function for me: make calls, receive calls, send text messages, receive text messages. That’s it.

Ringtones never really did anything for me. I could care fish what song played when my butt-ugly boss calls me at 2 am while I delight in deep slumber. I did put in some work for alarm tones though. I sought high and low for the loudest, most obnoxious alarm tone I can find to wake me up in the morning. Kerrrrannggggg!

Cellphone games are a bore to me as well. Once I finished saturating my brain with GTA and Halo, those beep-beep-beep action games just don’t cut it even as a time-waster.

So I fishing thrilled my ass to death when I found out I can get horoscopes in my phone. Finally, a new use for my overpriced call and text machine: Horoscope Updates! Seriously, I love the service. Horoscopes really cheer me up, even if all it says is: “Don’t leave home today or make any investments. You will have really bad luck.”

LOL!

InPhonic has some of the best cellphone content you can ask for, including the best daily horoscopes for all the astrology fix I need! They own Wirefly, who we wrote about earlier with their awesome phone deals and exhaustive Wirefly ringtones, with all the tones you need to numb your ears. InPhonic and WeatherBug also recently inked a deal to provide weather alerts on your phone throughout the day so you never have to bring an umbrella, sunscreen and winter coat when you leave home all at the same time!

You can get InPhonic content from select InPhonic-powered Web sites and the mFly mobile content site.

Seriously!  Freezens seem to be offering Creative MP3 and video players, along with paypal funds, if you complete several low-cost commercial offers, and spam a few friends to do the same.

They’re offering some serious schwag and cash so I guess they must be making a good return off those offers you’re  completing.  If you’re not familiar with the concept, this is what is called an incentivized program.  What happens is, the website asks you to complete several offers - like join a trial membership to a dvd rental service or buy a $40 hair removal cream.

Upon completing the offers and referring friends to do the same, you get a gift.  In this case, you can opt for the gift to be the badass Creative Zen Vision:M!

The website, in turn, will be paid commissions by the merchants whose offers you signed up for.  These commissions can be up to four or five times what you paid for those offers.  To recoup their expense, the merchants, in turn, will pester you with calls and upsells and more spam to try and make more money off of you.   But you won’t care, of course.

Because everybody knows, all you need is a cheap Creative player to make your life complete.

Back in February, Superstar Kylie Minogue has promised fans her new album will be the sexiest pop album of all time. The album is due out by the end of the year. I can’t believe it will be a really sexy album considering there’s probably gonna be a song about her recent bout with breast cancer but I’m not even gonna wait. I’ve got the very first headline right here: KYLIE MINOGUE NEW ALBUM IS NOT THE SEXIEST ALBUM OF ALL TIME. LIAR LIAR PANTS ON FIRE!

The album is due out last quarter of 2007 so you have some time to burn before the world’s sexiest album of all time disappoints you.

As a sidenote, this will be Kylie’s 10th album!!! That’s really impressive and I’m sure it thrills her to have such a full body of work.